Have you ever been about to do something, say a business meeting, public speaking, visit the dentist and felt nervous or a lack of confidence? Here is a quick little technique you can do to change your undesired feeling into something more resourceful and prepare yourself for success in that event.
Before we start, just take a few moments to think about how you react to certain things. For example, do you have a favourite song that you might like to exercise to or makes you feel sentimental? Do you have a childhood memory that when you think about it, or talk about it with someone makes you laugh as if it had just happened? These are physical responses to an internal stimulant, responses that come from your unconscious mind.
If you know anything about NLP you will know the presupposition “everyone has all the resources they need to succeed”. The following process, the Circle of Excellence, takes on board this presupposition allowing you to experience your change of that undesired feeling or state into confidence, empowerment, or whatever you want, in your own way; you gain control over your own emotional state. Put another way, when you anchor in advance all of the positive feelings and states you may need for the event, and even mentally rehearse the event with those positive feelings in place, you are programming your mind for success.
Once you learn to influence your emotional state you then can control your behaviour and your outcomes. There are two important things to remember to make this as successful as you want:
- The better you can engage with the feelings i.e. the ‘state’ you want to have, the better this will work.
- If you have never experienced the desired state before then act and believe that you have. Experience it as you want to experience it.
So here is how to become more resourceful, more quickly and really get into that positive state that will assist your successful outcome.
- Take a few moments to relax. What is it you want to feel in place of the current feeling you have about the event? Perhaps you would rather feel confident, empowered, successful, dynamic, self-assured, at peace …
- Imagine a circle in front of you – big enough for you to stand in quite comfortably. You can even mark one out for a visual guide if you prefer.
- Now imagine you are standing in the circle; physically remain on the outside of the circle.
- Think of a time when you have really felt the feeling you want to elicit now. See what you saw through your own eyes, as if you are seeing it again now. Hear any sounds or voices you heard then that reinforce the feeling you want now and connect with the feelings in your body as if it were occurring now. Where is the feeling? Notice any temperature, weight, shape, vibration, colour – anything about the feeling that allows it to be enhanced.
- As the experience builds in your mind’s eye, begin to project the feeling into the circle. When it is at its peak physically step into the circle and ‘anchor’ the feeling into a natural gesture that seems to relate to the state – a word or phrase, a hand action, a nod of the head – whatever works for you.
- Step out of your circle and allow yourself to think of something unrelated for a short period of time (In a client appointment I may ask what sort of car the client drives). After a minute or so, think again of the forthcoming event, repeat your ‘anchored’ gesture and notice how much better you feel about the event. Allow that positive feeling you now have to see yourself successfully achieving your outcome. Now, notice how differently you feel about the event. When a person visualises a successful outcome prior to the event their unconscious mind is programmed to achieve the successful outcome. This then allows the person to behave in an appropriate manner to achieve the desired success.
Do you want some convincing? Watch sports people. Many will have a particular movement, grip or pose to bring their desired outcomes to the fore. I have seen many an All Black anchor their desired state before the start of a game. In fact, for some, the haka would be an intense anchor for their game.